It can sometimes seem the world is pushing down and holding our emotions hostage. The constant stream of negative news fires up our outrage and keeps it burning. Anger is often portrayed as wild emotions, uncontrollable—something to avoid. It prohibits us from actively listening to others, thinking logically, and presenting our best self. In the heat of the moment, our reputations can be undermined by anger.
Buddha said, “You’re not punished for your anger; you’re punished by your anger.” Anger is a human emotion. In and of itself, it is not harmful. Like any fire, if you try to contain it, it can consume all of its surroundings. So, the key to managing your anger isn’t locking it inside and denying its existence.
Set it free.
Set the fire free usually means it grows. Firefighters use controlled fires to benefit the forest and the environment around them. Controlling the anger will help you keep a level head as a leader and in life when events ignite your anger. Anger becomes harmful when we hold it in. Grudges ground your spirit. They keep you from moving forward.
Once we learn how to master our anger, we can take the energy produced by our emotions and release them. Holding grudges consumes our energy. That’s energy we can use to fuel our productivity. Our creativity rejuvenates us. When we control the emotions within us, especially anger, we present our best selves. Not only that, but we reserve enough of our energy to fuel our spirit and our projects. We work productively.
Here are some ways we can control our anger and release the energy. The Mayo Clinic suggests these 10 tips to release your anger.
- Think before you speak. Staying grounded by journaling, meditation, and listening to music can help you stay calm so that thinking before you speak in anger is obtainable.
- Express your anger. This is the key releasing it.
- Get some exercise. Exercise generates endorphins that help you feel calmer and better.
- Identify possible solutions. By shifting your focus to solutions, it takes the kindling away from fire. Write down solutions if convenient, or say them aloud to diffuse your anger.
- Take a time out. There’s nothing wrong with walking away from the situation. Cooler heads prevail.
- Stick with “I” statements to avoid criticizing others. Be specific and respectful when giving feedback. This will avoid blaming others and refocus on the problem.
- Don’t hold a grudge. Grudges are emotional anchors and consume your precious energy.
- Use humor. Humor defuses tension and is the opposite of anger.
- Practice relaxation skills. Practice deep breathing exercises. Write your feelings in a journal. You can even throw it away after you release it in your writing.
- Seek help. If at any time, your anger burns out of control, seek professional help with managing it.
Are you reading to commence your next journey? Reach out to me, AmyD, the Peak Performance Expert and Trainer.